Rant

One of the bloggers I follow has been having trouble with a weirdo at her bus stop and I just have to get on my soapbox about this. Folks, do not be afraid to make a scene if someone makes you uncomfortable. You don't need to attack or assault. You can at least start up pleasantly. ("You keep staring at me. Do I know you?"{channel your inner amazon or you protective mother bear persona to get this in the right no-nonesense tone.}) If he should begin to act inappropriately, tell him to stop. Do not ask him to stop. Do not go on the attack. Just say, "I don't like that. Don't do it anymore."

There was a creep that used to ride my bus. He would sit next to women and edge into their personal space. Pretty soon, he would be pressing his thigh against hers and leaning against her. but other women were so polite and timid about it that I wasn't aware of it until he tried it on me. I looked square at him and said clearly enough to be heard by other riders, "This is my half of the seat. Quit moving in." He got off at the next stop. Other women approached me later and told me he had done the same to them. So when he tried it on a sweet little high-school girl, I stood up, pointed at him and said in a clear, carrying voice, "This creep likes to sit next to perfectly decent women, then starts leaning against them and rubbing his leg against them. Get a good look at him and watch out for him." Other women cheered. Husbands and fathers glared. He never rode that bus again. One day when I missed my regular bus, he started getting on the bus I DID catch, saw me, and jumped right off.

Our shyness and politeness makes us vicitms. You don't need to be assaultive, but you need to take care of yourself. You will not die from making a fuss. I promise. If someone seems to be following you, stop, turn around and get a good look at him. Say, "Are you following me?" Say it in a loud clear voice. Stand up straight and strong. Take up space - don't shrink down and try to be invisible. Put the backs of your wrists against your hips so your elbows rotate out. You look bigger and stronger. Even if someone is following you, he will deny it, but he will also be more likely to leave you alone because you don't look like a victim.

If you get in a tight spot, don't scream "Help, help." Face him and bellow "NO!" "STOP!" "Go AWAY!" over and over till he leaves. You may look like a loon. You will be a live and undamaged loon.

And I trust everyone knows, no matter what weapon he has, what threat he uses, do NOT go with him. If he points a gun at you, throw your purse at his feet and run. It's very hard to actually hit a moving target with a handgun.

Does anyone know if anyone has worked out self-defense moves with strollers or with kids in tow? Things get crazy during shopping madness, we get so desperately distracted, and the predators are out in force. I cherish each and every one of you. Take care of yourselves!!