Sanna's Bag

“I never seem to have what I need when I need it. I’m going to make a belt-bag that’s bigger on the inside than on the outside, and just carry everything with me.”

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

post one thousand!!

This is the big one, folks. Tell me about your inner super hero.

There are three prizes:
One $15 Itunes gift card.
One mixed bag of Lindor balls
one item of your choice, be it willy warmer or six-fingered gloves or wimsical hat or beaded silk scarf or whatever (within reason, folks - no laceweight cashmere size four x sweaters, please) - made by me, for you.

The prize winners may choose their prize.

second of all,
How do I decide who wins? There will be three winners.
One, the super hero that I like the best.
Two, the entrant that wins the popular vote.
Three, a commentator chosen at random by having your name drawn out of a hat by my Darling Husband.


So let me get you started with - - INTARSIA, Warrior knitter!

Intarsia is brave. She will try new things, like entrelac, or like the new scheduling system at work. And she will do what she has to without histrionic drama - like driving home from work in the snow.

Intarsia is persistent. If she doesn't get something right off, she will stick with it, whether it's a perfect cast on, or that new scheduling system at work, until she gets it right.

Intarsia is honest. When she screws up with that new scheduling system at work, she freely admits it, without whining or excuses. Then, -see persistent.

Equipment:
Because Intarsia manifests these virtues, she is allowed - the Accessory Bag. The Accessory bag is what makes her a super hero, because it's bigger on the inside than on the outside, so she always has anything she needs for any eventuality. Like a cell phone and a blanket just in case that drive home slid away. And back up knitting to while away the time, and extra knitting in case she takes in some stranded traveler who also needs to beguile the tedium.

Appearance:
Intarsia has red suede over-the-knee boots, worn over black lycra leggings. Over the leggings she wears a thigh-length hand-knit silk tunic with red, silver and purple cables twining to accent her womanly figure. The accessory bag dangles from a silver belt. Sometimes she adds shawls, scarves, fingerless mitts, hats or whatever else strikes her fancy. Her hair is a mad silver mass, and, since it's yet another fiber to play with, it is worn every possible way, from curls to coils to braids to buns to totally swathed in the latest chappeau. Often spare needles get stuck into the hair and forgotten. Jeweled stitch markers have made their way in as well.

Intarsia has two missions in life:
To knit warm things for cold people,
and, to rejoice, in whatever circumstances she finds herself. Even driving on ice in the dark in a snow storm.(No one's shooting at me and I'm not pregnant! Hooray!!)

So, who's your inner super hero? I'll give you three days before I choose two winners. Then you get to vote on the popular favorite.

7 Comments:

  • At 3:03 PM , Anonymous Lisa Nowak said...

    Okay, I did this a little differently and went all Joseph Campbell with the birth myth and all that. It's not where I would have gone if it hadn't been Christmas, but I guess it's safe to say that I have a whole army of inner superheroes. Like the one who can predict the weather more accurately than a meteorologist with only a thermometer and a glance at the sky. Oh, wait, that's not an inner superhero. That's real. But I digress. Hmmm. I hope this all fits.

    Inner Superhero: Noelle Perpertuanna

    Powers:
    * Creates the joy of Christmas year-round
    * Banishes post-Christmas letdown
    * Instills the Christmas spirit in people with a single glance
    * Entices children to be good all of their own free will
    * Summons fancy cookies, eggnog, and peppermint Schnapps-laced hot cocoa out of thin air
    * Sings carols with a voice so angelic it brings a tear to the eye of the most cynical person on earth and stops criminals in their tracks
    * And, most important of all-has the ability to create peace on earth for a 24-hour period

    Costume:
    * Made of green and red shimmering cloth embroidered with tiny colorful lights that can flash in patterns or be subdued in more formal situations
    * Bears the scent of a Douglas fir forest on a hot summer day

    History:

    Nola Perkoski grew up poor and neglected in a small family with no relatives beyond her mother and father. Her Christmases were devoid of gifts and boisterous family celebrations. In spite of this, she loved the holiday and decided that when she grew up, she would dedicated herself to making sure poor children and other orphans of society had a happy Christmas season.

    A life-long lover of good food and science, she earned a scholarship and studied chemistry, then took a job in research in an eggnog factory. One day, as she and a colleague were developing a recipe for a non-alcoholic nog that instilled all the good cheer of the spirit-laced variety, an unexpected chemical reaction caused a terrible explosion. Nola's face and arms were terribly burned, but when the bandages came off, everyone was shocked to see that the raised, ropy welts were not hideous, but had formed into what looked like long intertwining garlands of holly. Nola thought I can live with this and considered herself fortunate. Through the following weeks of painful rehabilitation Nola maintained such cheerfulness that she inspired happiness in all the doctors and physical therapists who worked with her. No one thought this was anything beyond her buoyant personality until she left the hospital and continued to inspire inexplicable levels of goodwill in her coworkers and strangers.

    Dedicated scientist that she was, Nola considered the evidence and formed a hypothesis that the chemicals in the nog had somehow affected her DNA. She began conducting experiments to test the extent of her powers. Once she had discovered their full scope, she was overjoyed to realize that she now had the ability to make her lifelong dream of spreading holiday cheer come true. She adopted the name Noelle Perpetuanna and began a campaign of creating year-round joy.

     
  • At 5:35 PM , Blogger Amy Lane said...

    OMG! That's a tall order. I'm going to be:

    Super Mom

    Appearance: Super Mom has two appearances--she looks damn spiffy in a pair of jeans and a T-shirt when she's going grocery shopping, to pick up kids, or at work, and she looks comfortably upholstered when she's sitting on the comfy chair with kids in her lap. Her hair is dyed--even the roots-- and she's always in full make-up (as I am not).

    Super Powers--she has a couple:

    A. The glare of silence--one look from those cold river rocks she calls eyes and all arguing ceases. So does sibling beating and bickering. When it's in full force, even the cats obey by jumping off the table.

    B. The Minivan of resourcefulness-- this vehicle (always equipped with a carseat or two) can accommodate: sweaters for six, soccer chairs for four, a picnic blanket, flats of water, ball point pens, work keys, a brush for emergencies, emergency make-up, car registration for those moments of being pulled-over-for-driving-white-trash (because that's her secret identity) an extra visor, extra hair bands, toys on the floor, emergency knitting, and some cd's in case you get out of range of your radio station and don't have an iPod handy.

    C. Multi-tasking capabilities--allows Supermom to cook dinner, do the laundry, listen to woes of the day, pick up kids who need hugs, wash the dishes and write novels all at the same time.

    D. The extra hand--no one knows (or wants to know) where it comes from but it allows Supermom to pick up amazing amounts of crap and load it in or out of her incognito Superminivan.

    E. The purse of mystery. Self explanatory. Mine is broken--it never has tissues.

    Personality--Smart, resourceful, sarcastic, warm, empathetic, hip (as she can be) and self-deprecating, the Supermom manages to not only nurture her brood's outer lives with nutritious meals (again--this function is broken on me), a calm, peaceful home, and potpourri, but also their inner lives by knowing which teachers they hate, who their best friends are, what their aspirations are, and who they are crushing on now.

    Weaknesses--Needs at least five hours of sleep a night and is devastatingly vulnerable without some sort of caffeine in the morning. Also subject to bouts of bad temper when her head space is constantly invaded by her children's inner lives. Occassionally has to fake the cooking thing.

    Supermom: To know her is to fear her.

     
  • At 9:58 AM , Anonymous Dave Daniels said...

    Congrats on the 1000th post! that's a major milestone for sure.
    And good luck on the superhero contest. The only superhero I'd be is you, and that's already been taken. By you! (and I'd vote for the Willy Warmer because I'd use it as a coin purse!)

     
  • At 10:13 AM , Blogger Heide said...

    I vote for Supermom!

     
  • At 2:54 AM , Blogger Janette said...

    Congratulations for your 1000 post!

     
  • At 3:18 PM , Blogger Em said...

    I'm not sure if I'm too late to enter the contest, but I thought I'd respond, anyway. My inner superhero is Everywoman. She has a startling array of abilities, and rather a muddled history.

    Costume:

    Everywoman traditionally wears blue jeans, a tailored shirt, and sensible shoes. However, she has a versatile wardrobe of costumes from which to choose, and has been known to show up at more formal affairs in The Little Black Dress. Few realize it, but her wrap is actually a cape. It just doesn't appear to be one until she needs to use her superpowers.

    Special Abilities:

    Everywoman has many abilities, in varying degrees. She's fluent in manspeak, childese, and womanchatter. She can jumpstart a truck, change a tire, and assemble furniture, all without breaking a sweat. She can prepare a tasty, beautiful meal from a cabinet containing only boxed macaroni and canned cabbage. She is a font of trivial knowledge, and is definitely the person you want on your Trivial Pursuit team.

    Everywoman can bend the space-time continuum, so that she's never running late or forced to stay up 'til the wee hours for anything. She has been known to pack thirty or forty hours into her day, and it's commonly believed that she can be in two places at once.

    Her charisma is legendary. She almost never has to raise her voice, since she'll charm you into doing whatever she wants. Beware, though, because her motto is 'the iron fist in the velvet glove'. Cross her, and her powerful allies, and you will be sorry.

    Everywoman is gracious, graceful, and warm. She always remembers names and knows just how to fill awkward silences. She's also incredibly strong and resourceful. Should you be stranded on a desert island, Everywoman is who you want with you. She's entertaining, but never irritating, and she's able to literally move mountains, should the need arise.

    Equipment:

    Everywoman has a lot in common with Batman, in that she relies more on her ingenuity to equip herself. To that end, she carries the Utility Bag. It's a little more than a purse, and a lot less than a suitcase. In it, you will always find: an adjustable wrench (though she's not a mechanic), a lighter/matches (though she doesn't smoke) a comb, brush, compact, and hair spray (though her hair is always perfect) and a first aid kit that rivals a field medic's. The Utility Bag seems to be able to produce small items as needed, too, though she denies this ability. Should somebody ever need, say, a protein bar, she has one. If anybody needs a button sewn on or a hem mended, she happens to have needles and a selection of colored threads.

    Summary:

    Everywoman can do anything, and do it with zest and style. She's never afraid, never intimidated, and she'll crush you like a bug with a smile on her face, while everyone around looks on in approval (hey, you crossed her). She seems to be a model citizen, but she has a sense of humor, and is not above the occasional practical joke or cutting remark. Everywoman knows the value of eating her vegetables, but also realizes that there is a time and place for chocolate (and that is any time, any place). Everywoman is the person you call at 3am when there's an emergency, and she shows up fully dressed and coiffed, with whatever equipment is needed, a thermos full of coffee, and a smile. Few realize it, but Everywoman is only human.

     
  • At 6:46 AM , Blogger Kate said...

    I know I'm too late, but I wanted to post my superhero anyway.

    Name:
    Craftwoman

    About Her:
    She is strong, both physically and mentally. She can totally heft that fifty pound bag of colored craft sand without a problem. And doing the math to figure out how much she'll have to pay after her discount? Easy.
    Craftwoman is easy-going and charismatic. It's part of her power. When the Hive Mind takes over children, she charms them into giving her a chance and shows them that being crafty is cool.
    She is also curious. Craftwoman is always searching for new things to try, and new ways to do old things. This quest for techniques is what first made her realize the power she holds.

    Outfit:
    Craftwoman has many costumes to wear on her adventures to suit weather or cultural appropriateness (she travels a lot). Her favorite, however, is a pair of nice, dark blue jeans, a plain white blouse, and a slightly tailored cranberry red blazer. She also wears comfortable but stylish ankle boots with only a little bit of a heel.

    Powers:
    Craftwoman is fluent in all things crafty. She can out-wit Macgyvver with only a bit of string, some cardboard, scraps of craft felt and half a bottle of glue. She only uses her powers for good, though, and during the day she is a mild-mannered art teacher, trying to spread the joy of hand made crafts to young children before they grow older and become subject to Craftwoman's arch nemesis: the Teenaged Hive Mind. This horrible intangible creature finds susceptible teenaged children and burrows into their brains, leaving hints and suggestions and opinions on what is and isn't cool in its wake.


    Gear:
    Pockets of Holding: All of Craftwoman's pockets can hold about the same volume as the average bookbag. These are put to use storing things that may come in handy when fighting the Hive Mind: clever crafts, intriguingly colored yarns, and simple but fun projects to occupy even the oldest teen.
    Laughter: Craftwoman uses laughter to dull the Hive Mind that lies dormant in teenage brains, disabling it long enough to give her a chance to use...
    Good Feelings: ...a technique which many have attempted to apply to people all over the world, but unfortunately many fail. These good feelings can be those of accomplishment, cleverness, or even just reestablished self-esteem. The Hive Mind becomes dull and begins to fade when these feelings emerge in the brain it occupies, and if they last for long enough the Hive Mind will leave its host in search of another.

     

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