Sanna's Bag

“I never seem to have what I need when I need it. I’m going to make a belt-bag that’s bigger on the inside than on the outside, and just carry everything with me.”

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Sunday morning, six AM

After the snow and the below freezing temperatures, a layer of warm, wet air has slipped rolled over the top of our dry cold air layer. This results in freezing rain. No one is going anywhere today unless it's absolutely necessary, because the whole world is covered wit about a quarter of an inch of ice. it's ugly for trying to get around, but it's beautiful to look at. Here's our dogwood tree under the streetlightthis morning.

Yestereday, if I had been Matha Stewart, I would have gotten up bright and early, baked scones and a quiche from scratch, and my husband would have eaten it because, as Martha Stewart's husband, he would have no balls at all. After washing the dishes and leaving the kitchen spic and span with every pot in place and the hand-embroidered linen dishtowels meticulously draped on their antique drying rack, I would have disassembled, steam cleaned, and polished the cats before re-assembling them in apple-pie order. Then, when the domestic staff arrived, I would have them all wash the windows, inside and out, to admit that glorious Christmassy glow and glitter from our exquisite quarter-sized, electic village errected outside. Then, while they were all distracted, I would have sat down at my Chippendale desk and caligraphed graceful, sincere notes to go along with their Christmas bonuses, which I would tuck into envelopes hand made from re-cycled Christmas wrap. Then I would go fix a delicious hot oyster stew with home-made biscuits for lunch, and everyone would eat it and they would like it because I'm GOD!! Hahhahha!!! I benign dwpot of the universe and you will all . . .

Umm, yeah. As it is, I slept in, slopped around in my bathrobe till DH woke, and then we went to Sully's for breakfast as usual on a Saturday. We gave them presents. They gave us presents. It snowed. The geese were circling low, trying to find a nice green sppace to settle and graze in. There are no greenspaces. Everything is WHITE. DH and I envisioned goose bitterness. "Cindy said, 'oh, let's stay in Portland this winter. We don't have to fly all the way south. The slugs up here are the size of dog poops and the ponds never freeze. We'll be living on easy street.' Is this easy street, Cincy? Is it? We've gotta sit in the freakin' snow and my BUTT's cold! I'm wearing down-lined panties, and my butt - is - cold! And it's all your fault, Cindy." People at other tables were laughing at our vision.

Breakfast was, as ever, delicious. We drove home on the white streets, and as we turned into the grocery store parking lot, our SUV fishtailed a bit. As we picked up a few groceries to get us through the next week, we discussed weather and driving conditions and seasonal expectations and decided that it would be much better to avoid the idiots on the highway and do our shopping when things thaw.

So we went home, and DH killed demon cows, and I watched movies and spun for the entire afternoon. Martha Stewart would have gone insane! WE had soup for dinner and watched TV till bedtime. Gosh life is good!


  • At 11:46 AM , Anonymous said...

    I'd like to disassemble, steam-clean, and polish Ethel. Maybe I could do liposuction while I was at it. The thing is, Martha actually has house-elfs in dirty pillowcases doing her bidding. If we could only slip them socks and hats, the entire edifice would crumble...
    I spent lots of yesterday making sure no one attempted to come to church, either for Altar Guild yesterday or for (canceled) services tody. K+ says he has outgrown his "warrior-priest" (Yes,he means as in D&D)stance on such matters.
    P. was incredibly productive, as usual, and has continued to be so.
    He is even now venturing out to buy more cat litter,radicchio for the rabbit, etc.
    The cats have cabin fever - well, except Ethelthelump. Someone peed in the paper-recycling bin beneath my desk yesterday, probably Adele, who dislikes litter boxes under any conditions, and especially having to share. Early on yesterday there was a perfect circle of paw-prints in the snow, exiting the cat-door and immediately returning. They want me to open the front door, so they can stare out awhile and then stalk off in disgust(Adele) or confusion (Fred).
    This too shall pass. And it won't be any easier on those who are truly suffering because of the weather, for us to overlook the fierce beauty of this Northern world we see only every 10 years or so.
    Stay warm, friends. See you soon.

  • At 11:53 AM , Blogger Heide said...

    I'm eyeballing the 2 1/2 gallons of milk in our refrigerator and contemplating rashioning to make it last until Friday. Of course with three girls that will never happen... and worse, we're out of coffee! I've never been much of a snow fan. It belongs in the mountains.

  • At 2:00 PM , Blogger Janette said...

    You are going to have to move to a warmer climate!

  • At 5:08 PM , Blogger Lyssa Kaehler said...

    Sometimes I go off on a domestic trip, but it's never really martha stewart style. My domestic nirvana has always been based on reading the introduction to Laurel's Kitchen as a wee vegetarian lass.

  • At 6:32 PM , Blogger Alwen said...

    ha ha ha! That was great! Clearly your sense of humor has not frozen.

    It was 8 degrees most of the day here, except when it was 6.

    I went outside one time, agreed with my son that it was so cold your boogers freeze, and came inside for Aztec cocoa. Life is good.

  • At 9:21 PM , Blogger Galad said...

    I think your version sounds better!

  • At 9:55 PM , Blogger Willow said...

    Please stay home and don't go out! Be safe! Ice looks nice but i's deadly to drive on.

    BTW, I like your idea of a weekend better than Martha's.

  • At 5:11 AM , Blogger Donna Lee said...

    I was feeling very Martha-ish as I baked lucious cookies until I turned around and saw the mess I had in the kitchen and I was the one that had to clean up. Pk to the rescue. He washed the dishes and wiped all the counters down for me as I packed away cookies. Um, the windows never got washed this fall. I guess Martha will be disappointed in me. In the meantime, I will be hanging out in my flannel pj's and drinking hot chocolate. The snow passed us by but the cold is intense.

  • At 7:59 AM , Blogger Amy Lane said...

    Yeah... but Martha wouldn't have had DH to do goose-impressions for you--and darlin', you've never had to do 'Martha time' for having Martha morals... I like your life better;0)

  • At 8:48 PM , Blogger Warrior Knitter said...

    But it sure is pretty.


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